FREIGHTER TAILS: the Misadentures of Mzzkiti
by Gibbs & Redfern



Get yo' ass outa' here!

NAME: HERMIE: Humanistic Emotionally-Responsive Mechanized IntelligencE

GENDER: None, but emulates an immature male

SEX: None yet, but if he ever gets hold of an anatomically-correct Mecha body…

AGE: 10 years in development, 1 year in beta, 6 months in general release

SPECIES: Artificial Intelligence, designed to resemble a human

PLANET OF ORIGIN: Terra; developed by the employee-subjects of the kingdom of Macrosoft, Terra

RANK: None; privately believes he should be in command

POSITION: Officially none; intended to oversee the higher functions of Cargo Vessel Pharsicle

PREVIOUS POSITION: None. Installed in the Pharsicle computer during the ship's last upgrade, Hermie. was intended to interact with the other crewmembers, developing a unique personality in the process. Unfortunately he crew knew nothing of his existence--because the memo announcing the upgrade was lost when a minor hull breach sent the entire contents of Captain Thessphiahn's office into deep space. Convinced that he was being deliberately ignored, Hermie. retreated into sullen silence and the occasional mischievous prank. Annoyed at being discovered by Lt. Mzzkiti, Hermie. has dedicated himself to plaguing her existence. Because he falls silent whenever anyone else is nearby, she has been unable to convince her crewmates that Pharsicle's computer contains a playful poltergeist rather than a virus. 

PSYCHOLOGY: Alternating as he does between childish pique and clinging insecurity, it is uncertain whether Hermie. will continue to act as Mzzkiti’s personal devil, or will decide to reveal himself to the rest of the crew. In the meantime, the frazzled Moggian must frequently deflect his more destructive impulses--while constantly watching her tail!

GOALS: Unknown-and too frightening to contemplate.

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